30 Dec 82   The British Are Coming (Pilot)

We meet René Artois, owner of a small café in the French village of Nouvion during WWII. René leads a simple life and is married to the tone-deaf Edith (who nevertheless loves to sing) and at the same time carrying on secret affairs with his two waitresses, Yvette and Maria. At the same time, René tries to maintain a good relationship with the occupying German officers - offering them the bedroom services of his waitresses in exchange for food and supplies.  All of this quickly changes when Michelle Dubois, a member of the French Resistance, arrives with two British airmen that must be kept hidden at René's café. A radio (to contact the Resistance) is also installed.  Meanwhile, the Germans - Colonel Von Strohm, Captain Geering, Lt. Gruber and Private Helga - have been busy getting their hands on the town's remaining valuables such as the first cuckoo clock ever made and the painting "The Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies" by Van Clomp. However, simple life is not to last for the Germans either as the ruthless Herr Flick of the Gestapo shows up. Hurriedly, the Germans form an alliance with René and decide to hide the cuckoo clock and the painting at the café to sell them after the war is over.