A murder has been committed: a street entertainer, found apparently battered to death with a very small blunt object, on him bite marks from a very small crocodile. Investigating the incident in his typically direct manner, Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson discovers the death was an accident, the man having choked on a swazzle. It emerges that the entertainer had invented a parallel, live-action version of Punch and Judy, using -- and abusing -- a troupe of gnomes as the live cast. Captain Carrot asserts that such brutal theatre could never find favour in Ankh-Morpork: "That's not the way to do it".  "Theatre of Cruelty" was written in 1993. The name derives from a theory coined and advocated by Antonin Artaud (Theatre of Cruelty).  It was originally written for W. H. Smith Bookcase magazine and was then slightly modified and extended, being published again in the programme of the OryCon 15 convention, and then again in The Wizards of Odd, a compilation of fantasy short stories.  It has since been made available on the Internet along with dozens of translations by fans, with Pratchett having stated, "I don't want to see it distributed in print anywhere but don't mind people downloading it for their own enjoyment."  The story involves both the Ankh-Morpork City Watch and a parallel of Punch and Judy.

A short and funny story about the death of a Punch & Judy man (like Mr Partridge from Hi-Di-Hi) only his puppets are actually goblins in costume! Carrott is detailed to find a witness and he starts questioning Death! The resolution is exactly what we expect from TP, a mix of tragedy and a hysterical twist on the absurd presented with total conviction. This is the way to do it